Tooth Fairy

I sincerely hope that the Tooth Fairy remembers this girl with a gaping hole in her mouth. Anaesthetic is over, and it's far from pleasant. And I still have the molar looking at me, laughing at me, taking the piss and giving me the finger. Yes this molar has a finger for that very purpose. Trust me to get burdened with such a molar. But then if it's such a naughty molar, then perhaps the Tooth Fairy will be more generous. It used to be a 50 cents in my day and age, maybe it'll be upgraded to at least 50 Euro, although that is not much of a compensation for all the misery. We should have tooth funerals where the pulled out parasite is placed in a glass box on show for all to see, but I wouldn't bury it. Teeth do not decompose anyway, or so I see on C.S.I. I'd leave it as a memento for all to see each time they remember me. The royal tooth of a royal queen. Now if that isn't grandiose... Oh come, oh Tooth Fairy...

It's gone

I am back. Geeze that sounds just like the pompous fart writing in the paper. But I really am back... minus the wisdom tooth, which is no tooth but a big big molar. I have it wrapped up in a box right in front of me. And I am writing fast because I don't know what pain it'll involve once the anaesthetic dies out. And I want to send a message but I have no pigeon, and even if I had I wouldn't make it go to M'Scala would I? Noooo it would be a royal pigeon sitting on a velvet burgundy cushion. Thank God for my dentit, the pain was overtaking my mind, literally, she had no option but to try and do it locally. And God being on my side, because I always, without fail, write truthfully in my blog, it worked. Although it did seem as if my molar was not giving up on the home it's had for years. Sometimes I don't know if to laugh or cry. A horrible thought has just crossed my mind, shall I wrap up the extracted molar even more carefully and DHL it to M'Scala? Because I might be missing the molar but I'm not stupid. I don't think I'm missing the wisdom because I never had much of it. Why do some people, gentle people too, think that molar pain is something you can shrug off very easily. Perhaps I should present myself and show my big gaping hole that's now in my mouth and see who is man enough not to faint. I don't faint, I love gore, I'm attracted to it. Most people aren't though and it's so nice to see them ooohhh and ahhhh and.... loosen the grip on themselves. I also have a blue certificate to go with the extracted horrible molar, probably a certificate for bravery? Maybe B = B as Blue = Bravery? Whatever, it's gone now and I can proudly show it off like a scout. I'm not as mad as people think. And this time I've got all the proof in the world.

Wisdom and teeth

The left part of my head, mouth and neck hurt. I cannot even open my mouth to talk properly. Such is the suffering of impacted wisdom teeth. But that doesn't make me stupid. Yes it makes me very miserable because it flipping hurts. But that still doesn't make me stupid. It makes me taking a couple of Nurofen every three hours, and yet I know it's supposed to be every five hours but I cannot manage the pain. Still not stupid. And of course I have been to the dentist. And I'm going back too, she just has to give me something for this kind of pain. I need surgery, consisting of extracting my flipping tooth which has given me nothing but trouble, but such surgery is considered major so I'll wait for the holidays seeing I cannot do it now anyhow because of infection. Again I am not stupid, and if someone asks me for proof, seeing that I can only open my mouth to insert a straw, not more than that, it'll have to be written proof. I have that already, this is no joke. It's bloody painful and right now if only I could wave my black magic wand and inflict it on someone so they might feel the pain, I would be more than happy to oblige... probably that doesn't make me very wiser, but then I'm only human. I cannot physically talk, but I can write.