The Fat word

I am reading some very clever comments left on the timesofmalta website by a lot of imbecile nit-wits. Is is all about the statistics of weight. And that is a sore point. The newspaper gets off the hook by me because it just states statistics. But really, the people who are leaving comments are amazing... in a very bad sort of way. It seems that fat equals being stupid, retarded and ignorant. It also seems that fat equals the fat person's fault. And worse of all, I am finding not even an inch of compassion. Were it commenting about the klandestini I'm sure I'd find a mixture of racist and non racist comments, people who would want to kill the klandestini by an atomic bomb, and others, kind others who ask the million dollar question... what if it were me? My mum may have failed me in a lot of things, but she certainly drummed in that one. When little, if someone made us cry and we would get all angry and want to get revenge, she'd say....you see how it hurt you, be sure never to do the same to anybody. And if someone was, well, 'different' for some reason or other she'd say.. think, what if it were you. During my childhood, gay acceptance was non existent, and there was this man who to us kids looked different. He wore make up, sometimes a skirt, and was very very feminine in his ways. The other kids would laugh at him, we never did. Not because we were the best kids in the world, we could be naughty too. But never in a vile sense of naughty. It was as if we were settled for life with a question very much resembling the... there but for the grace of God go I. I don't know if it was about God. Because God should love his creations equally. But we certainly didn't stare at him, or bad mouth him. One time, a group of kids were throwing stones at this man. We arrived home in tears, because we felt so sorry for him, yet we were too small to defend him. I never could understand this man, until years later when I got to know about the gay kingdom. Now, gay is sexy. Back then they called it a pufta. Now we know that gay people are born that way and it's ok. They are different, so what? In the same way, fat is different, so fucking what? I speak from day to day experience, it does not make me a moron. Or maybe it does, but somehow I also have a fat I.Q. to go with it. I have a tested I.Q. of 185... does that make me retarded? I also have a fat heart and with that, fat kindness. As for talent, that comes in fat talent too, and no I am not ashamed of sounding big-headed. If we are going to call fat as fat and a spade as a spade then so be it. And I have been the subject of the most distasteful jokes, the most distasteful behaviour, not just distasteful but downright cruel. I used to run away and cry. Somehow, somewhere people think that nobody has the right to be fat. So that means, that nobody has the right to be thin. It works both flipping ways. And if nobody has the right to be black, then nobody has the right to be white. And if nobody has the right to be short than nobody has the right to be tall. And yet God created variety so we might never be bored. And we have made it into a circus. Because hurtful remarks make me feel just as if in a circus, the queen of clowns. The tragedy of it all is that I have known the world when I was in all my glory, i.e. as thin as you can get, and the world was so so different. You never think that the world will change this much. And yet it has. My most frightful experience has to be the day I was given an unspoken lesson when I had to speak to a man who was my total opposite. I tried to avoid him a lot, but couldn't. He was/is svelte and small, and a very fine human being too. He never laughed one bit, he respected me and my size... and my mind. And I tried scanning and probing, there was no I-think-you're-a-queer vibe. Nothing. Just friendliness and downright honesty. And no matter what he says, it goes for me. He probably doesn't know what a dramatic impact he had on me. But I had never met someone as small and he had probably never met someone so big. And yet... he of all people, the one who could really take a back seat and laugh, took a front seat and kept my dignity in the process. I don't know why. Because according to the latitudes and the longitudes it shouldn't have worked out that way. I am so thankful that it did. Because at least I can have something to look back on. It hasn't been all that bad. It's been much worse. But I have survived somehow. Sometimes it has been so bad that you want to remove yourself entirely from the planet. Oh no, I'm not going to lay down and die, just hide a little bit in my home, which yes has all the blatant fat commodities. Mt tax return is also as fat as you can get. A lot of things are big about me. My dogs... they couldn't be bigger. My cats, the only svelte, trim and slim things in my house.... and they eat and eat and eat. And a consolation prize. My dad, a slim dad still thinks his daughter is the best. My Mister thinks I could be a contestant for Miss World. Me... I guess it's ok as ling as you have a pretty face like mine, thank you.