Monkey business

I'm still trying to find my way about monkeys, perhaps some monkey business too. Now I know exactly why they call monkey business as monkey business because it seems that this Alpha/Beta male/female theory keeps manifesting itself all day long, all week long... that's just about as far as I have made it. And perhaps it's not a theory after all, but it's been proved and I was sleeping somewhere all the while. Now and only now it is starting to make sense. But if we are behaving so like monkeys, then will I have to accept that my great-great-great-great-great-mother was an ape? Maybe not. Because maybe I come from a different breed of monkeys, the ones that read books, and listened to music and thought that theatre and films made a great night out. My breed also probably thought that Joe Demicoli was excellent. And yes I will keep harping on about this until somebody out there stops taking the piss. I am no hamalla and neither is Demicoli. My tastes are highly expensive, I am extremely high maintenance, you'd stop the hamalla thing in a flash if only you spent one day with me. My breed of apes were not hamalli, they just appreciated well made nonsense, loved to live and to laugh heartily and weren't afraid to do so. Because again, Demicoli stays. So please stop all the bullcrap and perhaps take time out to listen to what is probably the only decent comedian we have. There are other breeds of apes of course, those who thought that education is also important, that eating is the only past-time in the world, and that culture is something unheard of. And they are proud and think that it's funny because I get to cry while watching Traviata, and that I keep listening to Puccini's 'tre zbirri una carrozza' from Tosca because it moves me. They are proud, haughty, and so stupid because their genre of apes have been born musically tone deaf. And I think they secretly laugh too at Demicoli's jokes but they'd never admit it in public. So while my breed of apes has produced an Alpha female (I will never accept my being Beta even if I am) who is all about culture, seems another breed has produced an Alpha male (definitely Alpha) who brags about music being useless and to whom drama means the way he conducts his life. This breed walks with a shirt so unbuttoned, he'd might as well tear off all the buttons in monkey style. My breed also walk with unbuttoned shirts, but it's done delicately just enough to show off the headlamp assets. How do two different breeds cope? Good question, one I do not have an answer too. Somehow they cope, perhaps through a love for smoking, good food, laughing at each other and instinct. Because I'm not sure any breed of monkeys has a brain... except for my own of course.