In the name of the Cross?

Ok let's rate this as 18+. Please stop here if you're younger, which of course you won't but that's what porn sites say and under 18's probably still click on ENTER because there's nothing proving their age. As long as their parents are away. But it's no porn over here, just a bit of adult content, as in things happening in everybody's adulthood. Still, better be safe than sorry. At my age there is nothing shocking about knowing the facts of life. At 35 I should know all about sex. I guess I know something, if only a little bit. I know that sex is the way to go if you want to have babies, and even if you don't. I also know that sex really isn't everything, but is at least something. I know what are turn ons and turn offs. But one's turn on could be one's turn off. So, just to be very safe, let me write about one big turn off for me. Women and jewellery... turn on. Men and jewellery... turn off, that is, if they're not sporting a Rolex and a Bvlgari tennis bracelet, or a wedding band perhaps. Otherwise... turn off. But I seem to have a problem on my hands. You can call it off if a man is wearing a thick gold chain around his neck. I'd have no problem with that. What if he were wearing a really thin chain with a pendant cross? I would call that off too. But it seems I'm stuck, because this man has stuck to his guns. The chain stays. So does the cross. And although for him it's nothing to do with religion, perhaps it is for me. I don't hate God or Jesus. I know that Jesus died on a cross and it must have been terrible, horrible. I also think poor Jesus didn't deserve to die with so little dignity. A great man. All that's well and good. But why do we have to keep on celebrating his taken-away dignity so much as to wear it on a chain? It's unnerving. Man on top, cross dangling some millimetres away from your eyes. You could close your eyes? Wrong. Because the man insists, orders you to keep your eyes open. So you suddenly see Jesus looking at you when you're not in a position you'd want Jesus to see you. True, Jesus sees you wherever. He can see me when I'm in the bath, but I don't have a Jesus something in my bathroom. And then it's not a smiling Jesus who is watching, but one who really suffered, while you're having your bit of fun. It makes even the most brazen of girls turn very pious. So what's with these broad bare-chested men and the golden cross? They can keep it for day, but there is always a nightstand to put it safely on. I, for one, do not appreciate having it look at me. I prefer to push the fact that Jesus is watching to the back of my head. And I manage that, but not when it is so dangerously near that I could, perhaps by accident, swallow it. Wonder what the Casualty Department at Mater Dei would think of that?