Pity, respect and dignity

I haven't been blogging for the past couple of days. I thought it was because I was busy. But I am never ever busy to write. So it's not because I was just busy, but just plain old sad. Sure, plenty of things are sad in the world and perhaps I should lift myself up and see the world as it is. Yet, it's been too difficult. How can one sentence ruin a person for three days? Alas it can. I'm still thinking, pity and respect, and now I'm also thinking dignity. I'm also thinking sanity, my sanity. If three people see one thing as good and I see that same thing as bad, then who is right? It sounds just like a story sum, except that it is a story sum taken from the book of life. Is it to do with perceptions, but then how can three people think it's so awesome when I think it's the lowest, the basest of things to do? I have no idea. And the same thing has thrown me twenty million miles back on my journey of life. When I am 80 (because of course I will live to see the day when I will get all diapered up), I will look back and think oh God what a waste of time. But right now, it's no waste of time. I don't want pity, commiseration, I don't want people to kneel at the sight of me either, but just leaving me to my own dignity would help. I thought that once the storm was over, people would see their faults as I see mine. It's just not happened this way this time. And it's sad.