Hungry

I'm hungry. And nobody wants to cook for me. I think I'm dialing 179. Or 151. But that's only for abuse, drug addictions, alcoholism. Isn't it about flipping time they invented a phone line for hungry people? Isn't that a basic need too? It would be just like ordering a takeout, but it would be so much better because you'd have the right to stay anonymous, and this can order massive amounts of food without anybody having your name to call you a pig. I did go to lunch to my mum's today, but I wasn't hungry seeing I'd only just got up a half hour before. And although I love food, I absolutely cannot take food in the morning, or just as I've woken up. That is the problem. I go foodless till 10 in the evening, I don't even think of food during that time, I see other teachers' lunches and get so squirmy that I have to remove myself from them because it's all I can do not to throw up. Daytime is for coffee. And Diet Coke. Please do not remind me that Diet Coke is also harmful because it has aspartame, because I like it too much, I guess I'm addicted to caffeine, and I don't care because we all have to die some day. My tombstone will just read, Here lies the she who died from Diet Coke... and nicotine. Who cares? Because along these four years I've shaken off a lot of temperamental musician habits, but I am still temperamental and still haven't shaken off the Diet Coke and the strong coffee. My problem starts going into force at exactly 11pm when my body decides it's hungry and so say all of us. Then, I cannot have enough of food. And I know eating late is so so unhealthy, but I am not very healthy anyway. So what do I do know? I don't know. It's kind of early to eat, but I have hunger pangs. This summer time thing always has a habit of ruining my day. Always. I never liked summertime anyway. It'll be even more difficult to wake up in the morning. My relationship with food has never been the textbook one. No that's not fair, it's the classic relationship you find on books labelled 'What not to do'. But then so is my smoking habit. And my Diet Coke. All through this Diet Coke, and I've never ever met the Diet Coke man. Sad. That's it. I'm off to eat, whatever it is.