My letter to the little one

My dear little one,

I have been thinking of you all day long. I hope you have had enough to eat, I hope you have found clean water to shower in and clean clothes to put on. I also hope you haven't found some other kid running in the street who thinks it's a lot of fun to call you ugly and a bastard. It makes my blood boil to think you could have had to face that again and I am just 5 minutes away, yet so helpless. I hope you've had a good day today, and are now sleeping in the land of wishes which you like so much. I know all about your one wish because you have told me so. And although I don't look like a fairy, well I'm still going to try and wave the magic somehow. I know you like wishing on a star, and trying to believe, that's what you sing all day long. You're not even aware of that, but I am. And it is no coincidence that that is what you sing ad nauseum. I am too wishing on a star. And also trying to believe I can make it for you. I want you to have the best of everything. It's about time I wiped away your tears for the last time and made your wish come true. Your wish is also mine. But you have been promised so many things and nobody has ever delivered. How are you able to trust me so much? I am just another adult, like all the other ones who have let you down. Of course I promised I will never ever let you down, but I wonder how your fighting spirit keeps believing that I will make it all right for you. I am doing my very best, it's not easy little one. I swear to God that I mean well, and that I will let nobody or nothing harm you anymore. It's high time you smiled for good. But authorities are such assholes. Ok assholes is a word I shouldn't say in front of you, I know that, but sometimes I can find no better word. If anyone has called you a bastard again, fear not, you are far from that for me, you are like a little angel with broken wings. I see so many children every day, why did it have to be you to stick to me so fast? And why, of all people, did you think I would take to you in the manner that I have? Life is a funny thing babe, for you it's been a hard one till now, I know you have never got to see the funny part. It is not I who have chosen you, but you who have chosen me. Why, I have no idea. But things in life happen for a reason, it is the only way I can explain it. And since I am absent at this very moment, I can only put my trust in God who knows all about this little angel. Please watch over him when I am absent, do not let him suffer, he doesn't deserve any more of that. He might be a feisty little boy, but he is so all good inside. It is not a case of feeling sorry for this little one, it really is a case of loving him with such a fierce love that only a mum knows about. I wish I could wrap him up and take him for good. Perhaps God will listen to me. I really hope so.